Sunday, January 17, 2010

You Can't Polish a Turd.

Yesterday's weather was superb. Sat on my stoop smoking cigarettes and talking to whoever passed by. Kinda helping me overcome the anxieties I mentioned in my previous post. Walked around for a bit. Didn't accomplish anything. It was ok.

Toliver came over and we cleaned the apartment. She talks a lot. I was grateful for her presence. At the same time, I've been spending so much time alone that I wasn't really talking back. Was supposed to go out with Shayla, but she texted me that her roommate was sick and they were staying in together. Wasn't particularly disappointed by it. We'll hang out again sometime soon. Her roommate flirts with me. It's funny. Her roommate talks to me more than she does. I wonder sometimes about Shayla. I was kind of a dick last year to her on a few separate occasions. No surprises there. Wonder why she stills talks to me.

Me and Toliver went to fiume afterwards. I ordered Ethiopian food downstairs. First thing I saw on the menu. Said beef and collards. Two things I like. The waitress asked me if I wanted it raw or cooked. I couldn't hear her as the music in the bar was too loud, and her accent was heavy. I asked her to repeat herself 3 times. Thought she said "rare" rather than "raw." Told her that was fine. Turns out, she really meant "raw." I was starving, so I ate a plate of raw beef at a divy Ethiopian restaurant. Toliver kept encouraging me to eat it. Hope I don't get E. coli. They forgot the collards.

She called Megan. A completely different Megan from either of the other two entries. We went over there. I used to have a crush on this Megan. And she used to flirt with me when we first met. But my friend Brandon was sort of there first. And he was madly in love with her. So I kept my distance. Last night she was flirting with me hardcore. To the point that even Toliver kept looking at me with raised eyebrows. This Megan is super intelligent, beautiful, successful. Very literate. Goes to an ivy-league school. For her graduate degree in business. She's all-around one classy babe. In short, couldn't figure out why the hell she was flirting with me. I'm a scruffy vagabond who sleeps on an air-mattress in an empty apartment in the ghetto. Toliver eventually left and Megan started rubbing up on my shit. So I started rubbing up on her shit. I've had a crush on her forever. But somehow I realized we would never work together. I'm a bit intimidated by her. We fell asleep on the couch together, her the little spoon. But she wouldn't kiss me. Maybe it was cuz we were drunk. Later she woke up and we moved upstairs. But she wouldn't let me sleep in her bed. What a weird girl. I'm blaming it on the alcohol. What a facilitator. And an inhibitor. Had to leave early cuz Toliver doesn't have keys to this apartment and she's showing it today. Left a note. Megan texted me 20 minutes later. Guess she woke up right as I was leaving. I texted her asking her to go bowling on Thursday. She said it sounds fun. We're also having dinner Wednesday. For Toliver's birthday. Both Megan's will be there. How bizarre. And I'm bowling with another Megan on Tuesday. How bizarre.

I don't even particularly enjoy bowling. Not that good at it. But that's probably why it's a good thing to do with a girl. When me and Megan B. went out we shot pool. That's a game I'm good at. And it gets weird. Especially when I'm on point. Cuz then I'm really good. And the girl always feels ashamed. And doesn't have a good time. With bowling, we can both suck. And it's more fun that way.

Apparently Toliver is the teacher of Dan's girlfriend's little brother. I'm good friends with her too. Robin. Toliver mentioned her student and said his name. "David Preiss." Preiss is pronounced "Price." So it was weird that I caught it. I said, "Is it spelled P-R-E-I-S-S." She said yeah. This is where my world's collide. It's like how Morgan works at my old high school. Morgan was the first of the three girls I really thought I was in love with. She called me the other day and told me a whole bunch of shit about how amazing she thinks I am. It was the best thing I've heard in forever. Really inspired me.

I started a match.com profile. Out of curiosity. Wanted to see what types of girls it would match me with. The criteria mainly seems to be that I like swimming and I'm a middle child. Otherwise the system lacks sophistication. Keeps pairing me with latino women with big hoop earrings that live in south Jersey. Says, "95% match! Like you, she loves dogs [something I never said; I merely said I didn't mind dogs.], she is a middle-child, and she loves swimming!" Another one was exercise. I said I exercise 5 times a week. Cuz I walk all the time. And I consider that exercise. So I get all these fitness freaks.

I should really work on making these posts funnier. So far the only post I thought had any humor value to it was the first one. Mainly that was just funny to me.

But I don't want to stop typing. Because as soon as I do, I'm alone again. Not that I'm not when I'm typing. Just that I'm not thinking about it. Maybe I should try to write a story. Or something. Jim is supposed to come into town today. I need to see him. Need to talk to him. He's one of the last people I feel completely comfortable around. Used to be Rebecca, but she has become more hermetic lately. And she stays with Peter constantly. Which he is sorta hermetic as well.

I'm going now. Goodbye internet world. Feel free to direct my attention to anything interesting.

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